lapse of spirit

sometimes you just need a break from being the strong one.

you need an evening to let everything catch up with you.

to feel upset for you instead of for everyone else.

instead of holding up for those who need you.

its hard when you think the whole story might mess things up.

to try and tell part without telling the whole.

you look more stupid without the background story.

and it takes all the strength you have left to hold back the rest.

it would be easier to tell everything, to put it all in the open.

you don't want to add more fire to the flame that others feel.

so you neglect yourself.

and wait for a moment of bottled up emotion to break free.

and when it does, you push it away as quick as it came.

do the needed damage control, and go on as if it never happened.